ripped from worldofwarcraft lj community
Stolen from my new realm’s forums. Gave me quite the chuckle 
A) When driving to the store to pick up your game, remember to obey all traffic laws, going 95 miles in a school zone will only make you get a ticket, which will take more time than if you didn’t speed.
B) Telling the nice police officer that it’s an emergency, you must devend Azeroth against the Burning Crusade is not likely to get you a police escort, it is more likely to get you a visit with the Men in White Coats.
C) When parking, remember that WoW-Itis is not recognized as a Disability, you still can’t park in the blue parking spaces right by the door, no matter what your friends have told you. Also, yellow parking spaces are not for loading your Game, and red parking spaces do not mean ‘Emergency WoW Parking’
D) Remember to take your Keys, Wallet/Purse, Jacket, and Children when you leave your car. Keys to get back into your car, wallet/purse to pay for the game, Jacket to hide it from the other Obsessed WoW Fans who are still rushing into the store after you, and Children should never be left in the car alone, it’s just plain wrong.
E) Visit the store two or three times before Pickup Day, that way you can map out the quickest way to get to the Electronic Games section. Plan a few alternate routes through the lingerie department and the garden tools just in case the main isles are blocked by a group of Elders from a Tour Bus.
F) If you can, make friends with the manager of the department. Telling him/her how impressed you are with the speed they get games on the shelf is more likely to encourage him to actually BE quick to get them on the shelf. Bribery is frowned upon, but sucking up is always in fashion.
G) When you find the display of WoW Games, be careful, watch out for other Rabid WoW Fans who might throw obstacles in your path to delay you. They want to be the first to get the game, and will stop at nothing, even broken limbs to assure their success. Don’t let the Rabid WoW Fans succeed, watch where you are walking and be ready to jump over any merchandise that suddenly appears in your path.
H) Once you get your game into your hands, remember it is not (technically) yours until you PAY for it. Kissing and hugging the game, or trying to rip the box open with your teeth is not a good idea. The nice security people can call for the Men in the White Coats as easily as the nice police officers.
I) Jumping up and down and screaming at the top of your lungs is a sure way to signal the Rabid WoW Fans that someone else has beaten them to the game, putting your limbs in danger.
J) Make sure you have alternate ways to pay for your game. If a sunspot interferes with the Credit Card system, have a check already made out to the store, keep enough cash in your wallet also, just in case.
K) Kissing the Department Manager, Clerk, Bagger, or random people standing in line is not recommended. You never know what kind of illness you will catch, preventing you from playing for 196 hours straight.
L) When leaving the store and going to your car, make sure you STILL HAVE your keys, wallet/purse, jacket and children. Again, your keys to get you into your car, and your wallet/purse to show your drivers license to the nice police officer. Now is the time to use the jacket to hide the game from slower Obsessed fans, and if you leave your children at the store, you will simply have to turn around, drive back and get them again. This will delay your gameplay.
M) Map out your route home, make sure you have alternate routes in case of police activity, 24/7 traffic radio station, GPS and travel mapping sytems in your car are also a good idea.
N) When arriving at your house, make sure you bring in your Keys, Wallet/purse, and children (no more need for the jacket) Get them all into the house and taken care of. 5 minutes delay now will allow you to have several hours of playtime. Snacks for the children and a good movie is recommended.
Hehe!
Tags: blue, car, care, department, drive, game, home, kiss, mat, movie, need, office, sad, speed, stop, traffic, travel, walkin, warcraft, world, wow